edan season 3

dondi Aku ga mau ngaku klo aku nangis krn kangen. Aku ga mau terlihat lemah. Aku gamau ngemis cinta. Tp mmg keadaan nyatanya gitu. Takutnya klo keyauan aku sdh bertekuk lutut dibawah kakinya, dia akan memanfaatkan aku habis2an. Hingga aku mati kering. Lagian aku merasa minder dan tak layak untuk diriny. Aku dia berburu om2 kaya utk menghidupi gaya hidupnya. Dan aku merasa aku bkn org kaya yg mampu memberikan itu semua. Kenapa semua pikiran negatif ini muncul? Tak berhakkah aku hidup dengan cinta? What the hell I will be positive. Hee will loves me back dearly and hee will not use me as his toy Aku menjauh krn aku kehabisan uang dan aku menyesal krn aku ga bs nahan rasa ini dan aku ingin sll dekat di sampingnya dan aku sll berada disisinya God show me what to do. I am lost without u. And I think I am lost without him too. 8:51am Muhammad Arief Budiman Hee just read, hee doesn't reply my bb. His pic shows that hee misses somebody else. My dream shows that hee has somebody else. Suddenly stupidly I want him ask for stuffs to me. I don't want him ignoring me. It hurts a lot. Finally it happens. I can't say no when hee asks for bb. But I m not sure what we r. I hope hee loves me deathly. I curse him to loves me sincerely. I curse him to luph unconditionally. I curse him to love me crazily. I curse him to luph me desperately. I curse him to luph loving me. I don't know how I can be this stupid person. Hope god will help me. I believe god will protect me from all evil intentions out there. Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come?Kok bisa? How come? i am still crying.i do surrender under his feet.he treats me so bad but i will come back to him.he do me shits but i cant get away from him.he got some kind of magnet.and i always come back in my room pitying myself.i need a frined physically.need u in front of me physically.always want to come to u but i am afraid.i am afraid what u think of me.i m afraid what is in ur mind.i m afraid u think i am stupid,coward,chicken,idiot.i am afraid wont be my fren nomore.but i really need u 8:51am Muhammad Arief Budiman Berkalikali aku mencoba menjauh. Tapi kenapa aku sll kembali dibawah taklukkannya. WHY LORD. I don't understand. I really don't. Kok aku mau diberlakukan spt ini? Why lord? Stop please. Sumpah. Rasane ra karukaruan. Loro gabeh. TuhannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnNnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn Someone treats u bad. U treat me bad. God I just know this kind of pain. I don't want it. How can I make this into positive thing. Tell me pls. I am stuck. I can't think clearly. My everything is full of him. I can't live like this. This is hell. This is disaster. This is dark. I need YOU really bad. Beforr I know love, I sex all the time and I am fine. Now that I know love everything is ruin. I don't feel good at all mentally and physically. And I always come back to the person who did this to me. Am I enjoying the pain? Did I ask more pain? This is unbelivable. Do u think 800 is cheap. That is my salary a month. I live in a cheap room, 300 a month. With wall of wooden board