Ruined when doing id pray…………………..

Remember that time………………….. When she is still alive………………….. But I cannot meet her………………….. Devastated………………….. When I do my id pray………………….. Tears are running down………………….. Without warning………………….. Without pre thought………………….. Without expectation………………….. Without premonition ………………….. It runs down hard………………….. Unstoppable………………….. Ashamed………………….. I tried to hide………………….. That is why………………….. Now I don’t come to id pray………………….. Avoid it………………….. Sorry lord………………….. I am afraid lord …………………..