Between Fear, Blessing, and the Unknown

 

Between Fear, Blessing, and the Unknown

Mrs. Rose calls my name again—
another conference,
Europe,
and suddenly the old shadows wake.
The memories still cling to me
like cold wind on a winter street.
I never wished to return there.

I told her softly,
I told her honestly—
the fund is too high,
my pockets too small,
and I don’t think
I’m that rich in this world.

But if there is fortune,
if God opens a path,
who knows—
I will follow,
just go with what heaven allows.

Even though the letter of refusal
already sits in my hand,
its words fragile
but honest—
I will not be able to join.

I don’t like what happened before,
but every journey holds
a secret meaning,
every struggle
a hidden positivity
waiting to be found.

Now I stand in the middle of two roads,
heart trembling,
mind tangled.

I am confused, God—
help me.
I don’t know which way to walk.

I surrender, God.
Take this confusion from me.
Guide this clueless heart
into the light
You choose.