heart broken

i just met him. IT TURNS OUT HE ALREADY HAS ONE IN HIS ROOM. IT IS LIKE he has two concubines. and i am one of them. hiksss. he treats me bad. he never kisses me. it makes my heart hurts alot. i hate being a third wheel. but i dont say it to him. i just say that i want to meet again and i want to be fucked again. it never does me good being a third wheel. i believe it happens many times. and i never learn my lesson. and i often repeat it again and again. i ask myself what do i look for in this? may he see my writing. i wonder what is in his thought? i dont care about that. i just want to express my feeling. i dont want to bury it in my mind and become a very hard burden for myself. i want to scream. my heart is broken. it is naive to expect him to love me. it is too good to be tre. i am defeated. the boy is more handsome. more sexy. more big. more hot. i wish the lord give me strength to beat him.....