the light, the big and me

i just stood there staring at the big standing there while the light warming me i tried really hard deep breathing inhaling You understanding You searching You where are the signs? i am not that good YET need You to show me explicitly that You are exist that You are here with me around me protect me then the clouds hide the light is it the illumination? is it Your way to illuminate me? don't go believing You You can do EVERYTHING i can do what You allow me to do You can do all the big things admiring You realizing how small i am realizing how great You are then the life goes on i am here carrying Your gifts (kalimati 191214 0600)