I want to go around…………………

But I cant go around………………… The reason is that I don’t have a motorcycle here………………… And there is no guide………………… The solution is gojek for replacing the motorcycle problem………………… And the internet for replacing the guide problem………………… Money wise? ………………… I should let it go………………… I should make it easy………………… If this is a positive thing………………… There will be replacement from god………………… We don’t bring money to the grave………………… So………………… Let just relax over it …………………

All day I have been sick…………………

Starting from last night………………… Tired………………… Fever………………… Get a lot of ac………………… Because of smoking………………… Because of eat fast………………… God………………… I am back to you………………… I don’t have anybody here………………… I don’t want to be sick………………… I want to be strong………………… If I am sick………………… There will be no one to take care of me………………… I hope I can take care of myself………………… I hope I have the strength …………………

Actually…………………

There is one………………… In my place………………… While I am waiting for gojek………………… Seeing them having date………………… Hiks………………… Make me sad………………… They are good looking………………… And they get partner easily………………… Me? ………………… Oh god………………… Help me………………… Give me the best………………… The best for you………………… If my heart is sad like this………………… Only you the one I remember………………… Because you are the only one who can………………… Send me somebody………………… Nobody else………………… That is why………………… I ask you………………… To send someone for me …………………

Just before there is a friend from program …………………

Who will make an activity in the weekend………………… I hope it is true………………… And I hope I can join them………………… If it is not true………………… If I cant join them………………… I hope I am not sad and depressed………………… Like the last weekend………………… Completely crazy………………… There is no activity………………… There is no motorcycle………………… Very confused………………… The second plan for weekend………………… Is to go around by myself………………… By gojek………………… Or practicing………………… Or anything else………………… That will make me happy for sure …………………

I want the program to be full…………………

From morning to afternoon………………… From Monday to Saturday………………… So I don’t have free time………………… Because when I am free I become sad………………… Stressed………………… Depressed………………… Because I don’t have friends………………… Because I don’t have activities………………… Because there is no motorcycle to go around………………… The reality is not like that………………… The program is only short………………… A lot of free time………………… The solution………………… Fill the time by practicing………………… Praying………………… And practicing again …………………

Maybe there is another reason…………………

Maybe don’t believe in what they say………………… That seems very expert………………… Because in my brain………………… I still consider them the same level as me………………… But in reality it isn’t like that………………… The reality is that they do much more clever than me………………… In the term of religion………………… The solution is trying to have a positive thoughts………………… Will do that………………… That is also promise to myself …………………

Maybe there is another reason……………………….

Jealous because they are more pious than me………………………. Jealous because their religious knowledge is much more better than me………………………. The solution is………………………. Often read the quranic verses ………………………. Reading the Islamic articles………………………. Reading Islamic stories, novel, poem, drama………………………. Will do that………………………. That is promise to myself……………………….

Maybe I am filled with demons……………………….

So the calling towards good………………………. Makes me stressed………………………. So the solution is making the demons go away ………………………. How to do that………………………. Tgrough ruqyah to myself………………………. How is that………………………. See in internet………………………. Say the quranic verses………………………. While putting two hand palms in front of the mouth………………………. Then after finish reading the quranic verses………………………. Swap the two palms all over the body………………………. Will do that……………………….

if they talk about that problem……………………….

I become annoyed………………………. I don’t know why………………………. I want to know why………………………. I want to analyze myself………………………. So I know………………………. Why I am annoyed………………………. If I know the reason………………………. If I know the problem………………………. Maybe I can find a solution………………………. For now I can only guess……………………….

Another thing that makes me stressed…………….

Is the article……………. It used to be easy for me to make an article……………. Now for me making an article is very difficult……………. At office I say to myself I will make it at home……………. At home I say myself to make it at office……………. At semarang I say to myself I will make it at malang……………. At office the reason because it is very noisy……………. At home the reason is because of the Korean dramas……………. At malang the reason because I don’t like it here……………. God……………. Please help me …………….

After I analyze myself…………….

I think I know……………. Why I got stressed here……………. One side is about that life……………. That I don’t have friend here……………. So I get very lonely……………. The solution is to concentrate……………. About friends that I got……………. In the program……………. They are nice, kind, and friendly……………. God send them to me……………. Coz they have meaning in my life……………. So lets concentrate on that……………. Enjoy that part of life……………. Coz god has reasons …………….

The plan is to study while eating…………….

But……………. When I come to the place……………. I just eat and daydream……………. My mind wanders all over the place……………. I cant concentrate……………. I cant my energy to open the material……………. But I force myself……………. To think about the positive things……………. Of this situation……………. Free……………. Not being imprisoned in the room the whole time……………. I get fresh air……………. I get new experience …………….

17 des 17 minggu…………….

Seharian d kos……………. Sakit……………. Mlm k cybermall……………. Meet lely……………. Diner……………. Belanja……………. Allahuakbar…………….

16 des 17 sabtu…………….

Londri……………. Matos……………. Ichiban sushi……………. Nonton……………. Java dancer coffee……………. Nonton……………. Allahuakbar…………….

15 des 17 jumat…………….

Kampus……………. Matos w natas andi widi jesika nama arum fina iko……………. Kampus……………. Allahuakbar…………….

14 des 17 kamis…………….

Kampus……………. Allahuakbar…………….

13 des 17 rabu…………….

Kampus……………. Allahuakbar…………….

12 des 17 selasa…………….

Kampus……………. Indomrt……………. Wrg……………. Allahuakbar…………….

11 des 17 senen…………….

Kampus……………. Matos belanja……………. Allahuakbar…………….

10 des 17 minggu’…………….

Maasage eror……………. Mlm k depans……………. Jalan2……………. Allahuakbar…………….

10 des 17 minggu’…………….

10 des 17 minggu’……………. Maasage eror……………. Mlm k depans……………. Jalan2……………. Allahuakbar…………….

9 des 17 sabtu…………….

Londri……………. Siang k matos……………. Lunch at ichiban……………. Nonton 2x……………. Allahuakbar…………….

8 dees 17 jumat …………………….

Kampus……………. Pak didik……………. Survey kos……………. Lunch w pak didik……………. Allahuakbar…………….