thai..

................... got news..................... that three of my friends got accepted there..................... happy but jealous..................... jealous but happy..................... jealous is bad..................... it ruins your heart..................... it ruins your thoughts..................... it ruins you inside out..................... must think positively..................... pray the best for them..................... ask lord..................... may i join them..................... soon ................................

dear lord ....

..................................... he is taking doctoral program............... but his wrtiting is extremely bad............... who will i tell............... i cant keep it by myself............... i will explode............... it is big............... for me it is painful............... adding me more jobs............... forcing me to correct his sentences first before translate it............... then thinking about students............... their writings are also awful............... so it is why...............

if i feel that it is easy .

.................................. i will stop in the middle of the process....................... assuming i can do it later....................... i will finish it fast near the deadline....................... meanwhile there is no deadline....................... lord i am afraid....................... lord help me please....................... lord why am i like this....................... this is me being very stupid....................... how come there is some kind of evil thing overpowering me....................... taking control what i do....................... taking control what i think ....................... holyshit.......................