Punishable past................

Lord................ I cant take it................ It hurts alot................ But then again................ It seems that you think i can handle it................ Maybe i will................ But i cant handle it right now................ It is very heavy................ It presses my chest so hard................ I cant breath................ I need air................ I need space................ I need you................

I cant tell the world................

That i am sad................ That i cry................ I just can................ Show my cry................ To you................ God................ You take it again................ My thing................ My love................ You make me................ Alone again................ God................ Help me ................

Being sad because of him................

Then................ What happen................ What should i do................ I want to spoil myself................ I cant be free from my things................ I should learn................ To let go of everything................ To make time................ For my love................ My god................ My work................

Man talk................

Everybody wants attention................ So who will give attention to me................ I also want to get attention too................ Being loved................ Being spoiled................ It is hard................ This gae................ To want all that................ They said................ This age................ I should give all that................ To others................ Huftttt ................

30 apr 17 minggu ................

Pagi k pedurungan................ Nunut net................ Siang indovision eror................ Satrio eror................ Allahuakbar................

29 apr 17 sabtu................

Pg k kampus................ Meet everybody................ K pati w asep kamto husni singgih joko fajar mei iin ferina................ At sma pgri 1 pati program pmb................ Lunch at pati................ Balik smg................ Kampus ambil motor................ Pul................ Mlm afmrt pulsa................ A;famidi buah n tlk angn................ Allahuakbar................

28 apr 17 jumat................

Wrg................ Kampus................ Cimb................ Kampus................ Pulgsk................ Dijemput satrio................ Diner at tlogorejo................ Satrio nginep................ Allahuakbar................

27 apr 17 kamis................

Kampus................ Aan k kampus................ Satrio k kampus................ Diner at cafe nongkrong................ Satrio k rmh................ Sgkcg................ Satrio nginep................ Allahuakbar................

26 apr 17 rabu....................

Kampus................ Pul gasik................ Allahuakbar................

If ALL of this is your love..................

I will accept all of that.................. Those shootings.................. Those cuttings.................. Those runnings.................. Far.................. Without stopping.................. And you place me.................. In that family.................. My heaven.................. You know that.................. My imagination.................. My dream.................. All goes there.................. In save.................. In comfort.................. In your embrace.................. Please.................. Lead me.................. There ..................

I am always sold out..................

because when you do me.................. I taste heaven.................. Because when you touch me.................. I taste paradise.................. Because when you use me.................. I taste sky.................. If you think i am able to handle all of this.................. I will.................. I will force myslef to be able to.................. I will force my brain to be able to.................. If you want me to continue to fight.................. I will keep fighting.................. If you want me to continue to struggle.................. I will keep struggling.................. If you want me to not to give up.................. I will never give up ..................

25 apr 17 selasa....................

Kampus.................... Hutan mangrove w asep kamto mei fajar.................... Diner at stadion.................... Kampus ambil motor.................... Wrg.................... Allahuakbar....................

Mr ef....................

Does he think i stole his job.................... I hope not.................... I do what i did coz i love to work a lot.................... And if that makes him think of me negatively.................... It is his problem.................... I feel i am getting close to the boss.................... Coz i love it when she gives me a lot of jobs.................... I love being busy.................... And i am afraid.................... He will think i am the licker.................... I love to kiss my boss ass.................... I am not.................... If he thinks that way.................... It is his business....................

Mr ef....................

Mr ef.................... Does he think i stole his job.................... I hope not.................... I do what i did coz i love to work a lot.................... And if that makes him think of me negatively.................... It is his problem.................... I feel i am getting close to the boss.................... Coz i love it when she gives me a lot of jobs.................... I love being busy.................... And i am afraid.................... He will think i am the licker.................... I love to kiss my boss ass.................... I am not.................... If he thinks that way.................... It is his business....................

Then suddenly she talks about her new one....................

Does she think i care.................... No i dont.................... I just acre about my id.................... I want my id.................... So i just give a very short answer.................... Maybe she thinks her story will hurt me.................... And make me give a short answer.................... And she thinks i still love her.................... Good for her.................... I really dont care.................... I just want my id.................... I need my id.................... To go places.................... To go abroad.................... To go everywhere....................

Then suddenly she talks about her new one....................

Then suddenly she talks about her new one.................... Does she think i care.................... No i dont.................... I just acre about my id.................... I want my id.................... So i just give a very short answer.................... Maybe she thinks her story will hurt me.................... And make me give a short answer.................... And she thinks i still love her.................... Good for her.................... I really dont care.................... I just want my id.................... I need my id.................... To go places.................... To go abroad.................... To go everywhere....................

I dont have to change the world....................

I dont have to heal the world.................... I just need to do what i do now.................... Being a part of the world.................... That is my way of changing the world.................... With my strength.................... With my skill.................... With my area.................... I dont have to do too much.................... I just have to do enough.................... God knows....................

24 apr 17 senen....................

Satrio nginep.................... Pg sarapan soto at tlogosari w satrio.................... Seharian d rumah.................... Allahuakbar....................

23 apr 17 minggu....................

Tengah malam dijemput aan.................... At baskoro.................... At ibas.................... At jogja by car with satri ibash brian baskoro sugeng.................... At wediombo beach.................... Sarapon soto at pinggir jalan.................... At tebing brexit.................... Lunch at raminten.................... At malioboro.................... Diner at magelang.................... Otw pul.................... At ibas drop him and brian.................... At baskoro drop him.................... Dianter sugeng.................... Allahuakbar....................

22 apr 17 sabtu....................

Pg pedurungan.................... Mlm satri datang.................... Allahuakbar....................

21 apr 17 jumat....................

Wrg.................... Kmpus.................... Allahuakbar....................

20 apr 17 kamis....................

Wrg.................... Kampus.................... Wrg.................... Allahuakbar....................

19 apr 17 rabu....................

Wrg.................... Kampus.................... Pulgsk.................... Alfmrt.................... Wrg.................... Allahuakbar....................

18 apr 17 selasa....................

Kampus mpe mlm.................... Baiturahman.................... Satrio eror.................... Wrg.................... Allahuakbar....................

18 apr 17 selasa....................

18 apr 17 selasa.................... Kampus mpe mlm.................... Baiturahman.................... Satrio eror.................... Wrg.................... Allahuakbar....................

18 apr 17 selasa....................

18 apr 17 selasa.................... Kampus mpe mlm.................... Baiturahman.................... Satrio eror.................... Wrg.................... Allahuakbar....................

One day..................

Lord will allow me.................. Meet that story.................. And just like usual.................. I will be lost.................. Falling uncontrollably.................. In your current.................. The morning.................. Mark of water.................. Smell of dirt.................. Good sign.................. Hope it will be good all day.................. Believe it will be good.................. There is no impossible for him.................. Ask him.................. And he will listen.................. Give goodness to him.................. Then he will goodness back to you ..................

17 apr 17 senen....................

Kampus.................... Allahuakbar....................

I cant hide everything from you....................

You know my dream.................... You know how hard i try to go to that place.................... But you think i dont deserve it yet.................... What now.................... There is so much work.................... So much to do.................... And you block me.................... You make it error.................... What is the meaning of it.................... What is behind it.................... Is there something i dont know.................... Of course there is.................... And i am very annoyed.................... Lord.................... Help me please ....................

16 apr 17 minggu....................

Pg nyabu at stadion.................... Alfmrt beli baju.................... Balik hotel.................... Siang cekot.................... At baiturahman nitip motor.................... At eling bening w satrio.................... at pasar bandungan.................... at baiturahman ambil motor.................... pul.................... mlm wrg.................... pulsa eror.................... alfmrt.................... allahuakbar....................

15 apr 17 sabtu....................

Pg renang.................... Siang baiturahman.................... Meet satrio.................... Lunch at lombok ijo.................... Nginep at sadewa.................... Mlm at mcd.................... Alfamart.................... Ambil motor satrio at baiturahman.................... Nginep sadewa.................... Allahuakbar....................

14 apr 17 jumat....................

Pg renang.................... Siang jumatan at panut.................... Nonton.................... Jemput aan.................... Ngempon.................... Pul ban bocor.................... Nganter aan.................... Allahuakbar....................

13 apr 17 kamis....................

Kampus.................... Allahuakbar....................

12 apr 17 rabu....................

Wrg.................... Kampus.................... Allahuakbar....................

11 apr 17 selasa......................

Kampus.................... Pulgasik.................... Alhamdulilah....................

10 apr 17 senen ......................

Kampus mpe mlm...................... Wrg...................... Allahuakbar......................

This emotion got me deep......................

Really deep...................... Got me stuck...................... Into really dark place...................... Send me to a far far away land...................... Where i cant find suck things...................... I hesitate to open it...................... I dont want to see the outside...................... The world is cruel to me ......................

I want to be hold......................

I want to be taken...................... My hands...................... Both of them...................... Take them...................... Hold them...................... Take me...................... Hold me...................... Thightly...................... Never let me go...................... Dont cheat on me...................... Dont be kind to me...................... If you want to leave me...................... That hurts me a lot...................... Very much...................... Oh lord...................... Help me please ......................

Being stupid......................

Not seeing you...................... But you were right there...................... In front of me...................... But it is too late now...................... I can only see you from afar...................... Being a ghost...................... Being transparant...................... You cant see me...................... There has been so many things...................... There has been a fierce strugglein my heart...................... I cant see others...................... Not a single one...................... There has always been you ......................

How can you......................

Doing this...................... To me...................... So cruel...................... You are heartless...................... This world is not easy at all...................... The night is friend...................... The lonely is companion...................... I am seeing you everywhere...................... But i am not finding you at all......................

I cant cry......................

When you take mine...................... But i do cry easily...................... When you give me story...................... Of someone else’s sadness...................... Hot damn...................... How come...................... Is it really for that story...................... Or is it the postponed cry...................... I always imitate my life with the story in front of me...................... I really am crazy...................... Am i not ......................

Can i have one of your sons......................

You have a lot...................... I know i am not worthy enough...................... Yet...................... Teach me how to be one...................... I hope there is someone who stands behind me...................... When i fall...................... And i know...................... There is one...................... You are the one...................... I stand before you...................... I stand tall lord...................... I held my head high...................... Accept me lord ......................

9 apr 17 minggu......................

Nyuci...................... Dijemput mbak din n fam...................... Go to alun2 ungaran...................... Meet yayan n fam...................... Go to watu gunung swimming pool...................... Go to ridwan peyek...................... Lunch at masakanpdg tlogosr...................... Diantar mbak din...................... Allahuakbar......................

9 apr 17 minggu......................

9 apr 17 minggu...................... Nyuci...................... Dijemput mbak din n fam...................... Go to alun2 ungaran...................... Meet yayan n fam...................... Go to watu gunung swimming pool...................... Go to ridwan peyek...................... Lunch at masakanpdg tlogosr...................... Diantar mbak din...................... Allahuakbar......................

8 apr 17 sabtu......................

Pg ped nunut net...................... Mlm ped nunut mkn...................... Allahuakbar......................

7 apr 17 jumat .......................

Wrg...................... Kampus...................... Pulgsk...................... Bookbos...................... Alfmrt...................... Allahuakbar......................

Please dont blind side me.......................

I want to know....................... I am sorry for being greedy....................... Being stuck....................... But cant announce it....................... Shouldnt publish it....................... Must not tell it to the public....................... Just share it with the lord .......................

Giving is being happy.......................

Put that in your mind....................... Your brain....................... Your thought....................... And you will live it....................... And you will be it....................... And you will grasp it....................... And you will be happy....................... Cant stop thinking of them....................... What can i do....................... I really want to help....................... Sorry of thinking of them....................... Instead of human....................... They are helpless....................... They are out of control.......................

Then the brain goes there.......................

Then the brain goes there....................... And you are frozen....................... In your skin....................... In your heart....................... In your eyes....................... In your brain....................... It is painful....................... Very excruciating....................... Need to lift the pain away....................... The three combination....................... Make you really dead inside.......................

Her.......................

The pix....................... The fren list....................... The poem....................... What the hell....................... Out of the blue....................... She talks about it....................... Why....................... How come....................... Where did it come from....................... Everything is suck....................... But i give it all to you....................... You are the powerful one....................... You can control it....................... You can undo it....................... You can continue it....................... It is up to you .......................

6 apr 17 kamis.......................

Wrg....................... Kampus mpe mlm....................... Diner at dapur emak w joko mei yusuf kamto fajar dwi atika arif....................... By jokos car....................... Kmpus ambl motor....................... Allahuakbar.......................

5 apr 17 rabu....................

Wrg....................... Kampus alahuakbar.......................

4 apr 17 selasa....................

Burjo.................... Kampus.................... Pulgsk.................... Superindo.................... Allahuakbar....................

3 apr 17 senen....................

Kkampus.................... Pul w b dini.................... Banjir dimana2.................... Allahuakbar....................