Something wrong................

When she is here................ For all this time................ I try to avoid her................ I feel that she disturbs my routine................ My being feels annoyed................ Want to be free................ As usual................ Without her here................ And then................ The news comes................ She says she will go home................ And the heart becomes uneasy................ What the hell................ Wish her the best................ To have a long happy life................ A lot of fortune................ Get along well with him................ Get nearer to Him ................

Dont know.................

There is so much going on................. Inside my head................. The reason why i am here................. For the speech................. For the free meal................. For the view................. Everything................. Leads to you................. Near you................. Be with you................. In your embrace................. In your place................. In your protection................. Being calm................. Being at peace .................

A lot of questions.................

The tone of anger................. What is actually he is talking................. Hearing him makes me angry................. The way he delivers his speech................. Annoying................. Remembering mine................. Reflecting myself................. Is it the same way................. I think so................. This is scary................. The way how he tries to warn me................. To show me................. About myself................. My dark side .................

The talk about that land...............

And i am suspicious............... That they want this land to be like that............... What the hell............... This is not your land............... This is our land............... It is not you who determine what kind of land this will be............... My ancestors fought hard for this land............... Not to be yours only............... It will be selfish of you............... To control this land as you wish............... Your words only............... Your want only ...............

Free meal...............

At grand mosque............... I feel that god gives this food............... I feel that............... I will be healthy............... If i eat this food............... This is amazing feeling............... Want to feel this way all the time............... May lord help me always............... That everyday when i get food............... The brain will think constantly............... That the food sent by him ............... Not just this food............... Not just the food in mosque............... But all food in this world............... All food that comes to me............... Is from him............... Is sent by him ...............

28 mei 17 minggu.....................

Siang jemput dian..................... Pands..................... Nganter dian..................... Sore pom..................... Majt/kultum/magrib/bukber/rest/isak/tarawih..................... Alfamrt..................... Allahuakbar.....................

27 mei 17 sabtu.....................

Kampus..................... Pulgasik..................... Majt..................... Satrio..................... Diner at bebek rabil tlogosari..................... Majt..................... Warteg..................... Allahuakbar.....................

26 mei 17 jumat.....................

Kampus..................... Diner w joko mei fajar yusuf kamto at dcost..................... Kampus ambil motor..................... Gagal tarawih..................... Soory lord..................... Help me lord..................... I blame them..................... Allahuakbar.....................

25 mei 17 kamis ............................

Pagi mpe smg..................... Kampus..................... Pul by gocar..................... Sore dijemput satrio..................... At paragon nonton..................... Diner depan rs tlogorejo..................... Diantar satrio..................... Allahuakbar .....................

Maybe it becomes problem..............................

When you announce.............................. Your state to others.............................. Publicly.............................. Maybe it wont matter.............................. If you keep it secretly.............................. Secretly enjoying the love life.............................. Before him.............................. He will be the only one.............................. The only witness.............................. And the one who will.............................. Always on our side ..............................

The leaders of them..............................

In the headline.............................. They make new law.............................. That says.............................. They will kill all these people.............................. Hmmmm.............................. Lets kill them first.............................. Lets see.............................. What side you will be.............................. You promise.............................. To always love your creatures equally ..............................

So the decision is made..............................

The state of me.............................. Being hidden.............................. Secretly.............................. But not before him.............................. He will know.............................. I will tell.............................. Everything.............................. Every detail.............................. Every step.............................. Every move.............................. I make.............................. We make.............................. And ask for blessing.............................. That he will give ..............................

The first day....................

Cant do the ritual.................... Blame them.................... Coz of the jobs.................... Coz they ask me.................... To accompany them.................... But.................... I should blame myself.................... Coz i cant say no.................... Sorry lord.................... Help me lord ....................

The memory....................

Feel that i didi mistake.................... I cant take care of them.................... I dont want to get close to them.................... Coz i am afraid.................... If i give them my heart.................... They will ask for more.................... And that is.................... What usually happens.................... That is why.................... I stay afar ....................

Cant see the road.....................

Afraid..................... Dont have the courage..................... To see the ongoing process..................... Of the journey..................... So the conclusion is..................... Being irritated coz of them..................... Using the chair..................... Uncomfortable .....................

The sound of the irritated soul.....................

The chair irritates me..................... It cant go incline..................... The food irritates me..................... It is too much..................... The breakfast..................... Snack one..................... Snack two..................... It makes me bloating..................... Hot damn..................... Feel irritated .....................

The sun too.....................

Irritates me..................... It strikes me..................... Through the window..................... Really hot..................... Uncomfortable..................... The bus too..................... Very fast..................... And break a lot of rules..................... And dangerous..................... And so be it..................... Just enjoy the journey..................... It will get there..................... Savely..................... Eventually .....................

The sun too.....................

The sun too..................... Irritates me..................... It strikes me..................... Through the window..................... Really hot..................... Uncomfortable..................... The bus too..................... Very fast..................... And break a lot of rules..................... And dangerous..................... And so be it..................... Just enjoy the journey..................... It will get there..................... Savely..................... Eventually .....................

Thx god.....................

I bring this..................... The pen and the paper..................... It saves me..................... What..................... Coz you just can do it..................... Pour it out..................... On it..................... On the paper..................... To erase the pain..................... You feel inside..................... Nothing else matter..................... You find your world there.....................

Very disturbing.....................

Very annoying..................... Everything crushes you..................... Heart and soul..................... Hot damn..................... It has been a while..................... To use that phrase..................... Miss that phrase..................... But then again..................... It is so damn frustrating..................... The song too..................... Irritates you..................... To the bone..................... Make you feel ill.....................

How to enjoy it.....................

What should i do..................... Something must be done..................... To fill the gap..................... The hole in the chest..................... Something wrong..................... So much error..................... Trouble is friend..................... She is in so much state..................... The kind that will put you..................... In the position where..................... You cant be on the level..................... Of being in the sunshine.....................

And they walk.....................

Fruit for eyes..................... Hope that kind of thing..................... Who is beside me..................... But that is just hope..................... Just dream..................... Just wish..................... It would be great..................... If that kind of thing..................... Come to reality..................... But it doesnt..................... And that bothers you alot..................... Your being got disturbed.....................

And then the brain.....................

Wanders..................... The thought gets something..................... To entertain your soul..................... So that you are not annoyed..................... Everything will be ok if you can..................... Accept everything what is..................... In front of you..................... Coz the lord plans it..................... So believe it..................... It is for the best..................... There is a reason..................... There is a meaning..................... Behind all of this..................... You just dont know it yet .....................

The want.....................

The hope..................... Is not like the reality..................... Wish to be alone..................... In my chair..................... And i will be free..................... To do everything..................... Not being disturbed..................... But the reality is..................... Someone sits next to me..................... That is annoying..................... The solution is..................... To accept all condition..................... So just calm yourself..................... Your nerve..................... Your brain..................... Everything will be ok..................... And then you can enjoy..................... This thing into max .....................

The stop.....................

The song..................... What..................... The next sit..................... Everything is annoying..................... I just pour it out before..................... On the writings..................... But still..................... It still..................... Annoying to the core..................... Hot damn..................... What should i do..................... I had forced myself..................... To accept all .....................

Mosque....................

The distraction.................... Comes from everywhere.................... Left.................... Right.................... And inside.................... And they win.................... So bad.................... And i lose.................... So great.................... Just give it all to him.................... Let him handle all of this.................... I had tried so hard.................... To be the winner.................... Afraid if they can hear my thoughts.................... Afraid that they will not sit next to my sides.................... Afraid of evrything.................... Should not.................... Coz lord with me....................

Room....................

Watching the series.................... Other stories.................... Sad stories.................... I cry.................... But i cant cry.................... Of my own story.................... My sad stories.................... I am numb.................... That is weird.................... I feel weird.................... Strange.................... Seems like.................... I cant explain.................... It is what it is....................

Waiting is the most depressing thing for me....................

My mind wanders all around.................... Think negatively.................... Hating them.................... Coz they make me wait for them.................... Think that maybe something bad happens to them.................... Coz they are not here.................... If they are fine.................... They should come now.................... Not make me waiting.................... Hot damn....................

The plan is....................

When i am at my room.................... I plan to do jobs at office.................... But when i am at office.................... I just not do it.................... Coz i choose to do something else.................... Play with the net.................... Stupid me.................... And then i plan to do.................... The jobs at home.................... But when i am at home.................... I dont do it.................... I choose to do something else.................... Watching the series.................... A lot of them.................... I think i will need a lot of time.................... The rest of my time.................... Maybe.................... It is frustrating.................... Is it the devil.................... I always give myself.................... A lot of reasons for not doing the jobs.................... That is bad.................... Really bad.................... Want to curse myself....................

The x vid....................

And the story in the series.................... They are a match.................... What if.................... The god gives that story to me.................... To tell me.................... That there are others out there.................... Seem there is trouble.................... Hope everything will be fine.................... Hope the show will go on.................... Without interference.................... It is important.................... Pray to lord.................... He will help ....................

Now at office....................

Wait for them.................... I have already announced.................... But nobody comes.................... I want to go there.................... But i should wait for them instead.................... Wish they are on time.................... So i can do many jobs.................... Not like this.................... I have to postpone.................... Coz i have to wait for them.................... Damn ....................

24 mei 17 rabu ............................

Hotel cek out’............................ Sukowati............................ Otw smg............................ Lunch at soka............................ Diner at situbondo............................ Allahuakbar............................

23 mei 17 selasa ............................

Brajasandi............................ Tari barong............................ Dewata............................ Pandawa............................ Jimbaran ............................

22 mei 17 senen ............................

Sarapan at soka............................ Tanah lot............................ Bedugul............................ Joger............................ Kuta............................ Ibc............................ Krisna............................ Hotel neo............................ Allahuakbar ............................

21 mei 17 minggu ............................

Otw kampus by gocar............................ Otw bali w pgsd 11 bus............................ Maksi at tuban............................ Diner at probolinggo............................ Allahuakbar............................

20 mei 17 sabtu ............................

Hotel w satrio............................ Sarapan soto at hasanudin............................ Pul............................ Jemput maya............................ Resepsi arif and widya............................ Ngantar maya............................ Baiturahman meet satrio............................ Nonton at eplasa............................ Atm............................ Allahuakbar............................

19 mei 17 jumat ............................

Kampus............................ Pul............................ Smart budget hotel............................ Simpanglima............................ Meet satrio............................ Diner at baskoro............................ Hotel w satrio............................ Allahuakbar............................

18 mei 17 kamis ............................

Kampus............................ Pul gasik............................ Allahuakbar............................

17 mei 17 rabu............................

Kampus............................ Pulgsk............................ Sk............................ Allahuakbar............................

16 mei 17 selasa............................

Kzampux............................ Jaga smbptn............................ Pulgsk............................ Potong............................ Allahuakbar............................

15 mei 17 senen..................

Kampus............................ Pulgsk............................ Allahuakbar............................

Feel bad.................

Talk bout him badly................. And he is in the other room................. I think................. I believe he can hear me................. Feel screwed................. So i am sorry sir................. I am sorry lord................. Hope there will be fine................. Between us in the future................. There will be no problem at all................. At under any circumtances................. Coz it was just that .................

She promises again for another time.................

Being afraid again................. Like yesterday................. Being fooled................. Dont thing negaitve................. If you think negative................. Thus the negative happens................. Think positive................. Think that................. Thus the positive will happen................. It must be positive................. I am desperate................. God help me .................

Hope for the best......................

For their future...................... For my future...................... For our future...................... It is disheartening...................... To see what happen now...................... The matter of the world...................... The education sector...................... We cant do anything...................... They forbid us...................... And they lose control...................... Being very naughty ......................

Love that girl......................

That student...................... Seem nice...................... Not being overly at anything...................... Hope the best for her...................... The smoothness...................... In her study...................... In her love life...................... In her work world ......................

Love to love...................

A love b................... B love c................... C love a................... And the circle goes................... Round and round................... Never stop................... Always spreading love................... Always spreading positivity................... Noping to get it back................... The love................... The positive................... The light................... The shine................... The sun ...................

Cant sleep...................

Tomorrow have to get up very early................... Hope can make it................... Thx lord................... Can do it................... And the process is smooth................... The job for the day................... New people................... New experiences................... Love that................... So dont be afraid................... Of anything................... As long as you dont have the black in you................... You will be fine ...................

Thinking bout him...................

Weird................... How he replys................... The last one................... Makes me afraid................... Of the past................... Dont want to get that................... Over again................... Self defense................... Distance myself................... Really had high hope................... And really afraid................... Need you a lot................... To protect me................... To protect my heart ...................

The picture..................

Makes me dreaming.................. Beinf like them.................. That is the hope.................. The comment.................. There are two.................. The agrees.................. The disagrees.................. Damn.................. Why dont they all are agree at that.................. Wish they do.................. So i will be more certain.................. About what will happen.................. In the future.................. The rain will stop.................. The sun will shine.................. The rainbow will be bright ..................

What the heck...................

I have been alone for a long time................... And then you come and claim yourself as my father................... And then you come and claim yourself as my mother................... Go to hell................... I am my own father................... I am my own mother................... I will be fine................... I am not alone................... God is always with me................... Not you................... Both of you................... Go away................... You ruin may life ...................

14 mei 17 minggu..................

Renang.................. Bulik nunut net.................. Alfmrt.................. Mlm dijemput satrio.................. Diner at omah jones.................. Diantar satrio.................. Allahuakbar..................